


When Life Gives You Lemon

by Shuufleur



Series: Trope Bingo Fills [10]
Category: Captain America (Movies)
Genre: Gen, Happy Ending, Hurt Bucky Barnes, Hurt Tony Stark, Hurt/Comfort, Post-Captain America: Civil War (Movie), Suicidal Thoughts, Trope Bingo Round 9
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-10-31
Updated: 2017-10-31
Packaged: 2019-01-27 09:32:03
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,030
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12578744
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Shuufleur/pseuds/Shuufleur
Summary: Going back to that HYDRA bunker may not have been a good idea.





	When Life Gives You Lemon

**Author's Note:**

> For the square _Happy Ending_ of my Trope Bingo Round 9 card.
> 
> I hope you like it. :)

Going back to that HYDRA bunker in Siberia might have been a bad idea, but it was huge mistake not to have taken the suit with him. 

One second, Tony had been aiming a gauntlet at freaking Barnes, and the next moment found Barnes pushing Tony out of the way of an explosion. The wall the most exposed to it crumbled in on itself. It was apparently a bearing wall of that awful room. The ceiling ominously cracked before falling down in several pieces, plaster and dust flying everywhere. Barnes tugged him out of the way before a large part of the ceiling fell on him. The ex-assassin lost his grip on him, and for a moment, Tony couldn’t see, couldn’t hear and couldn’t breathe. 

He stumbled when he tried to get to the other side of the room, where it was relatively safe. He felt hands on him, helping him to get up. 

Barnes half carried him, but a piece of cement fell on him and he let Tony go. The inventor fell, scratching his hands on rugged pieces. He crawled on fours and huddled against the wall. There was a movement beside him. Something struck his head, and he went to the ground. The last thing he saw before losing consciousness was a glint of metal. 

The next time Tony woke, it was to lips on his mouth breathing in air, and a hand tilting his head back. He opened abruptly his eyes, choking on too much air. The hand and lips disappeared, leaving him heaving on his own. He turned on his side and retched. 

“Stark?”

He looked wildly around him, headache pounding heavily with the movement and making him nauseous.

_ not the cave not the cave not the cave _

It was semi-dark, cramped and smelt like dust. Barnes called again, and this time Tony’s eyes settled on the ex-assassin, who had a hand hovering in the air and was too close for comfort. The engineer shuffled back weakly, hissing when he felt two of his ribs grinding together. Barnes raised his hand as to show he wasn’t threatening. 

Right, Tony thought hysterically, the day Barnes wasn’t threatening would be the day Tony kissed Stern’s ass.

“Slowly,” Barnes said softly, “I must have broken your ribs when I did the CPR. Sorry.” he added with a grimace. 

“Why the fuck would you do that?” Tony said breathless and angry. “Why the fuck would you-”

A cough interrupted him, his ribs made him groan from pain. Barnes almost went to him, to help probably, but Tony stopped him with a glare. 

Logically, Tony knew why Barnes did it: he must have been dying so the ex-assassin had decided to save him. But his mind couldn’t think rationally. He was in a fucking caved in building with his parents’ killer. A man he tried to kill.

_ Fuck.  _

He wasn’t fine. 

Barnes moved, and Tony’s eyes snapped back to him, suspicious. The other man’s face closed off. He looked somewhat hurt. Tony snorted internally. The soldier couldn’t blame him: they had history and not of the best kind. Tony would’ve laughed if it didn’t hurt. Instead, he used his most smarmy smirk he could muster up and said, “What? It’s too hard to face the truth?”

If possible, Barnes’ face darkened, and for a second, Tony’s self preservation reared its head back to tell him what a fucking idiot he was being. Why would he provoke the guy who could kill him with one hand. The guy who had a metal arm which-

“I was trying to save you,” Barnes said blankly, as if he was reverting back to that  _ soulless scary  _ killer. But when Tony’s automatic response was to use his broken gauntlet went away, he paid closer attention to the other man. He looked… almost chastised, as if he was bracing himself for something, as if he was waiting for Tony to.. do something. He almost seemed like a scolded child. 

OK, not Tony’s best analogy, but that how he looked, meek. And God knows that man wasn’t meek by any mean. But Tony couldn’t help but feel like was he seeing Peter of all people.

Tony, a masochist, asked, “Why?”

_ Why did you save me? _

The glare Barnes sent him reminded him of Rhodey when the other man was clearly fed up with Tony’s shenanigans. That was a glare that said, “You’re an idiot if you don’t know why. Genius, my ass.” Tony may have embellished the glare, but the gist was here. And it suddenly made Tony homesick.

Barnes sighed, and crossed his legs to properly sit in front of Tony in that cramped space. 

“I’m not stupid, Stark. I’m stronger than you. I knew I could protect you.”

Tony rolled his eyes at the obvious answer.

“Yeah, no, I know that. Why did you save me? Me? As in a Stark? The guy who went after you and Rogers. You must be angry, right? Why don’t you kill all the Starks, uh? You would be free!”

Tony’s voice slightly broke at the end of the sentence. Barnes had frozen mid-way through his rant and still hadn’t moved. 

Yep, Tony’s self preservation left. Again. He never backed down in the face of danger before, why would he start now?

“I…” Barnes started. He had a full body shiver as if he was shaking something off

_ the winter soldier? _

and looked right at the engineer, an expression almost fragile on his face. 

“I know you will always blame me, because I do,” Barnes smiled deprecatingly, “I saved you because you don’t deserve to die.”

Irrational anger flowed through Tony’s veins. 

“But my mother did?”

Barnes flinched, as if Tony had given him a blow.

“Granted,” Tony barrelled on, “My father wasn’t a saint, and I can almost see why you would assassinate him but my mother-”

Tony choked on his anger. 

“I’m sorry,” Barnes said when Tony didn’t continue. He was hunched over himself as if he was trying to disappear or make himself smaller.

“I should’ve killed myself when I could. They would never have died then.”

Shock went through Tony as soon as he heard the sentence. Slightly gaping, the engineer watched as tears started to streak down on Barnes’ cheeks. 

Urgh, feelings. Dangerous, familiar feelings.

“Oh come on, Barnes. Rogers would have hated that. You don’t want to see his disappointed face I assure you.”

_ I’ve been on this end more than I could count. _

The ex-assassin  visibly swallowed and nodded. He passed a hand on his cheeks. It made Tony feel better. A tiny bit. Because even though he hated (not so much) Barnes, he didn’t want the responsibility of his suicidal tendencies. A few seconds passed in silence. Barnes had hidden his face behind his dark locks and Tony was trying to move in a better position, but you could only do so much with broken ribs. He decided to settle his back on the wall, half-sitting because he didn’t have the space to lie down, and staying sat up pained him. 

Finally, Barnes moved, showing his left side. 

“Hm. I think you lost an arm.” Tony commented matter as factly.

The other man snorted, and looked at Tony almost  _ amused.  _ He showed what was left of his arm, which had been torn down to the elbow, wires unevenly cut. Blinking, Tony licked his dry lips. He made a face when he tasted dust, copper, and salt. He leaned a little forward to better see the arm. 

“I didn’t do that, did I?”

Now that he could see Barnes’s face more clearly, he didn’t miss the deadpan look. 

“Nah. You didn’t this time.” With his right hand, he pointed behind Tony, to his left. The engineer turned and saw the arm sticking out from under the rubble. He winced in sympathy, and looked back a Barnes from the corner of his eyes. 

“Well, you can’t say it’s my fault.” Tony said with a little humor. “Even if you probably used it to protect me.”

Barnes seemed a bit lost at Tony’s tone before a tiny twist of his lips proved Tony he still had his wittiness, even with a concussion.

“Yeah,” Barnes snorted. “Your head, I reckon is pretty precious.”

Tony chuckled. 

“Better your arm than my head?”

“Yeah. Seems I can’t keep it more than a few months since I agreed to go with Steve.” 

Barnes blinked slowly, the corner of his mouth slightly raised.

“Was that…” Confused, Tony didn’t continue. The last time Barnes lost his arm, Tony had been the one to tear it down. 

“A joke, Stark. Yes, it was a joke. I think you heard of ‘em.” He smirked, “I’m still getting used to being… me.”

He shrugged and avoided Tony’s eyes. 

Right, good job, now it was tense between them. He sighed when the ex-assassin still avoided him. He decided to finally study their cramped space. The building went down on them, but the wall they were against held. The thing was the explosion blew up the only exit they could have taken. And without his suit, he couldn’t scan what was outside. That was a mess. 

“Alright, Barnes,” Tony said, and the other man’s eyes snapped back to him. It was unnerving the way he could look like a “Bucky” one second and the next, he was just the Winter Soldier. The engineer cleared his throat and continued, “here’s the thing: I’m pretty sure the wall behind me isn’t going to fall down on us.”

“But?”

“I’m pretty sure, we can’t get out. Well,” Tony amended, “we could, because you’re probably strong enough to clear out some rubble. But unless your hypnotizing eyes are bionic, we’re fucked without a scan.”

“Hypnotizing?” Barnes asked, furrowing his brows. 

_ Dumb dumb dumb why are you flirting _

“This is actually the part you latched on?” Tony commented, “not the part where I tell we’re basically fucked?”

“I knew that.”

Tony sputtered, “Seriously?”

The ex-assassin raised a dubious eyebrow. 

“You don’t have your suit, you have broken ribs and a concussion, and I’m missing an arm. I know the odds.”

The engineer did  _ not  _ pout. He did not. 

“You think you can be a Hydra assassin for the better part of 70 years, and not learn a few things?” Barnes quipped, clearly more comfortable now that their fate was doomed. 

“Oh, so you can joke about it. Nice, that means your getting over your uh…” Tony waved vaguely in the air, “Trauma.”

Barnes sighed. 

“Steve doesn’t like it but…” the man shrugged, as if he was saying “what can you do?”

“Right. Back to the main question: we’re gonna die.”

“They say you’re a genius,” Barnes piped up.

“Shut up Barnes, I didn’t ask you. I’m thinking out loud.”

“Don’t worry, you can continue.”

“Like I need your permission.”

Barnes’s only answer was a snort. Then he leaned back against the rubble and got comfortable, observing Tony. The inventor huffed, and spoke up. 

“Right. Like I said, we’re fucked. Basically, we have two options: we wait to be rescued and probably die by suffocation, starvation and thirst, or getting crushed when we inevitably decide to leave this…”

Tony looked around them, coughing. 

_ not the cave not the cave _

“That’s cheerful. Encouraging even.” Barnes commented drily. His face smoothed and reverted back to Bucky, the slightly brooding guy. 

“I think you forgot option 3.”

Tony frowned, but he didn’t understand what the other man meant. 

“If we can’t get out safely, then, as you said, we’re gonna lack oxygen.” The ex-assassin paused, visibly taking a breath. Tony made a motion with his hand to tell him to continue. 

“Stark, if... it happens, I need you to kill me.” 

Shock coursed through his veins. 

“What the fuck, Barnes!” Tony shouted, making his temples pound. “Don’t say things like that. Why- Why would you-?”

He stopped as he felt his heartbeat quickened: fear and  _ anticipation.  _

_ stop it, he wasn’t a killer _

“Stark, you know why.”

“Well, maybe enlighten me.” Tony snapped. “Pretend I’m dumb alright, I wanna hear your reasons. Because I don’t become a killer for anyone, especially when I know Rogers would just enjoy crushing my head between his two bare hands.”

Barnes had the nerve to sigh as if Tony was just an annoyance asking this pesky little questions. Dammit, with that guy it was like whiplash. At one point, Tony thought he could eventually get past the whole Barnes-killed-my-parents situation, and at another point, he was just infuriating. 

Barnes looked and stared at him when he enunciated his reasons.

“The world needs Iron Man and Tony Stark."

Tony rolled his eyes. Of course.

"I killed your parents," Barnes continues, "and I think I deserve it.”

Tony’s gut twisted at these last words. How many times did he think he too deserved it after Afghanistan, after Killian, after Sokovia, after that damn fight with Rogers? How many times did he think he should’ve died in that wormhole? He didn’t care to count. 

Tony spent three months in the hands of terrorists, and that had been one of the worst experiences of his life. He couldn’t imagine what it felt like to be Hydra’s puppet for seven decades. 

“Look, Barnes, I don’t know what you’re trying to do but making me a murderer won’t erase what you did.”

Barnes frowned before lowering his head, keeping silent. Tony couldn’t help but scoff. 

“Are you actually mad at me? For not wanting to kill you? Do you know how fucked up that sounds?”

The ex-assassin shrugged, and looked up at Tony.

“Would you blame me?”

Tony opened his mouth but quickly closed it. No, he wouldn’t blame him to want that, it would be hypocritical of him. 

“You do realize what you’re asking me? You think, this,” he said waving at Barnes, “would make me feel better or make  _ you  _ feel better?”

Steel gray eyes stared before half-closing his eyes. 

“Maybe.” 

The short answer still shocked Tony, even though he was expecting it. 

“You can’t pin this on me.” Tony replied, “and you know that Rogers would just never… forgive me if I did.”

“You still care about him?” 

Tony huffed, and lied, “No. He’s a self righteous prick.” 

He had been his friend. 

“Now what?” Barnes asked after a few seconds of silence, “since we’ve reached… an agreement on that topic, what do we do next?”

The engineer sighed. 

“We could blast our way out.”

“How?”

“Your arm is a wondrous example of Wakanda technology, I’m pretty sure I could rig something up.”

Barnes looked at him with an incredulous face. 

“I know I said I wanted you to kill me, but creating a bomb isn’t the best idea.” 

“Then was do you propose? Because you might be a super soldier but without my suit I’m just a squishy human with a concussion and broken ribs. So please, enlighten me.”

Barnes had the nerves to roll his eyes. 

“My arm is, as you say, the best technology on earth.” Barnes ignored the stink eye Tony threw him and continued, “it also has a tracker.”

Surprised, Tony looked at the arm.

“Yeah, King T’Challa was kind enough to give me the arm. With a condition…”

“So we could use it as a beacon.” Tony mused. “Wait… does no one know you’re here?”

Barnes looked embarrassed, and Tony repressed the urge to sigh.

“No. But I’m pretty sure no one knows you’re here either.”

When Tony didn’t answer, Barnes pressed on. 

“I mean, why would you come back here, in Siberia?”

“Fine,” Tony relented, “you’re right. So we were fucked. Now we’re 12% less fucked. That’s great, right?”

The engineer beckoned Barnes to him. The other man furrowed his brows, looking unsure. 

“I need your strength to take your arm back.”

Barnes nodded and crawled carefully behind Tony, who tried to give as much space as he could to the soldier. 

“Do I just…” Barnes trailed, mimicking dragging the arm out from the rubble. 

“Yeah, sure. Unless you can remove the debris without getting us crushed.”

Tony raised an eyebrow, and Barnes rolled his eyes. 

Dammit. For a guy who wanted Tony to kill him, he seemed too much unimpressed right now. Something he had to correct. After. If they get out alive. 

When Barnes started to get his arm out, Tony took a shuddering breath. Oxygen was getting thin, and their yelling didn’t help. That wasn’t good, if Tony couldn’t work on the arm, then they would both die. Well,  _ he  _ would die. He wasn’t sure Barnes  _ could  _ die, if he was anything like Rogers. 

With a grunt, Barnes got the other parts of the arm out. Some stones tumbled out, making both men freeze in anticipation. When nothing happened, they looked at each other with relief. They wouldn’t die crushed at least. The ex-assassin handed his arm and Tony gingerly took it. He patted down his vest, remembering he had a small-

“Haha!” Tony crowed in victory as he got the screwdriver. He turned the arm around to find the different plate in order to open it up and see the circuitry. As he studied the arm, Tony didn’t know if he should be jealous or impressed. The work was… magnificent. HYDRA hadn't made a shoddy job, but it had been for functionality more than aesthetic and comfort. 

_ complimenting HYDRA’s work, that’s a new one _

Clearly, King T’Challa’s engineers made a much better arm. The exterior was made of vibranium, which made Tony screamed in his head. Why could  _ he  _ have the vibranium? 

_ not the point Stark, you can complain to T’Challa when you get out alive _

_ If _

Inside was as beautiful as the outside, if not more. The circuitry was just clever. Every made sense and Tony couldn’t even see ways of improving it. He wouldn’t have done this way, sure, but it was really well thought out. 

“Stark?” 

Tony blinked and looked back at Barnes. 

“You kinda zoned out on me,” the man continued, “looking a little bit manic. You OK?”

Tony scoffed.

“Of course I’m fine, this,” he said showing the arm, “is going to save us. I just need to find the tracker and…”

He removed one the plates bothering him and followed a wire which he was pretty sure led to that component. 

Bingo. 

He tweaked the tracker so that it could transmit. Tony was certain he did it but he couldn’t test it, and there was no indication that the signal was actually going out. Suddenly, his lungs now felt tight. He couldn’t take deep breaths anymore. Ironically, it reminded him of the time he still had the arc reactor. He startled when a hand laid on his shoulder. 

“You OK Stark? I can’t see much but you don't look so good.”

“I'm not pretty anymore?" Tony tried to joke. When the other scowled at him, he said, "I’m fine Barnes, _I just need to… take a breath.” 

He leaned back against the wall and tried to gulp more air but there _wasn’t_ any.

God, it was a horrible way to die.

“Shit, I didn’t realize the oxygen was that low…” Barnes swore. “I thought…” He looked at Tony who was starting to feel his eyelids droop. 

“Fuck. Fuck.” 

The soldier scrambled back, looking frantically for something on the ground. Tony couldn’t even feel air passing through his nose. There was nothing left. 

“Dammit,” Barnes cursed, “I hope it works.”

“Language,” Tony murmured with a bitter smile. 

“Shut up Stark. Now, I’m going to put a mask on you. It will help you breathe. Hopefully.”

Barnes lifted the mask to show him before lowering it on Tony’s mouth and nose. Fresh air suddenly filled his nose and Tony blinked open his eyes. 

“Ok, ok, that works,” he commented after taking a full breath. The ex-assassin kind of sagged beside Tony. 

“How long till rescue comes?” He asked. 

“Hm. Depends. A few hours at best. Days. Or never.” Tony said, words chopped up.  


“Steve told me you were stubborn, so you’re gonna be stubborn and not die on me, right? I’m warning you, Stark, don’t die on me until they can take care of you.”

The inventor looked at Barnes and smiled behind the mask. 

“Are you worried for little ole’ me? I don’t know if I should feel-” Tony stopped to blink away the gray points appearing in his vision.  


“Flattered or scared,” he continued finally.

“Don’t sleep.” 

Tony chuckled tiredly. 

“Promise.” 

Dizzy and hurt, Tony didn’t know how long they waited in silence.  


_ breathe breathe breathe  _

_ fucking breathe _

At one point, he had started to shiver from the cold or maybe it was shock, he didn’t know, so Barnes laid down next to him and let his body touch him. Tony keened and burrowed into the warmth the other man provided.

“For a… soldier from… the cold… you’re pretty… warm.” Tony said slowly. His head lolled on Barnes’s shoulder, his eyes closing on his own. 

“Come on, Stark. Stay awake.”

The soldier shook him, and Tony whined lowly. 

“Let me sleep.” 

“No, don’t. Stark? Stark? Dammit, answer me!”

Tony closed his eyes and let himself go.

**

Waking up surprised the engineer. Waking up in a hospital room, filled with balloons in German didn’t even faze him anymore. 

Of course, it was fucking Germany. It seemed like the country couldn’t get enough of him.

Slugglish, he looked around him. He was alone in the asepticized white room, although a chair had been pulled up next to his bed. He hurt all over his body, but mostly his ribs and his head. He forgot about his broken ribs and concussion. Sweet. The tube he had in his nose itched so he removed it as soon as he regained enough control of his limbs. 

Wow, he must have been on pretty good drugs because there was Mr. Steve Rogers, watching him creepily from the door.

“Aren’t you a fugitive ‘Murica?” Tony mumbled. “Careful, you’re gonna get arrested.”

“How are you feeling Tony?” 

Rogers closed the door and walked to him. He was visibly hesitant, as if he didn’t know what to do here. 

“Sit down, sit down. You don’t want to insult me.”

Rogers frowned but complied. Incredible, he actually followed what Tony said. The other man suddenly scowled, and Tony realized he said that out loud. 

“Oopsie.”

“I’m glad you’re feeling OK.” the super soldier said with a slight twist of lips. 

“You can thank your frozen yogurt buddy. Pal. Evil BFF.”

Steve pinched the bridge of his nose and muttered exasperatedly, “Tony.”

Hm, this tasted familiar. 

“I’ll tell James you said that.” 

“James? Why not Buck-Buck? Bucky bear? Buckaroo?” Tony asked, his eyes crossing over when he realized that Rogers was sporting a beautiful beard. “Wait, wait, wait. Since when do you cultivate the lumberjack look? I guess the wood cutting thing we did back then showed you a new way of life. Or maybe you just want the rugged looks to match your criminal persona. I’m pretty sure women love that. You’re like the,” Tony waved feebly towards the other man, “the quintessential of goodie-two-shoes turned bad. I mean, I dig the looks but maybe-”

“Tony,” Rogers interrupted, blushing slightly, “you’re rambling.”

“Am not.”

“You are.” He paused. “But thanks, I guess. And yes, James doesn’t want to be called Bucky. He feels that it’s not him anymore and… I’m trying to be supportive.”

Well, he looked really sad about that. 

“Sure. At least, you’re a good friend to him. That’s something.” Tony said, his mouth running out on him. He blinked and wondered how Steve could look guilty and proud at the same time.

“You should go back to sleep. You’ll need your strength.”

“Not tired.” 

Rogers smiled softly. 

“Go to sleep, Tony.”

“You’re gonna sneak away if I do.”

The other man pressed his lips into a thin line. 

“I’ll tell Buck- James,” he corrected, “that you thanked him.” 

He stood and squeezed Tony’s shoulder. 

“I’ll see you later.”

“Yes, for another world catastrophe. Fun.” 

Tony didn’t have time to see Rogers walk out of that door before he went back to sleep. 


End file.
